Monthly musings

                                                                                        Harsh Words

                                                                                          by Doy Moyer


​Somewhere along the line, it seems our culture has been convinced that insulting people is the way to win others to their way of thinking. Harsh words that disparage intelligence coupled with character-destroying insinuations have become embedded in our arguments and disagreements. This is the way of the world, a path lacking grace and mercy and which can only lead to further division and hatred.
 
In leading up to the point that we need to take on the mind of Christ, the apostle Paul argued, “Therefore if there is any encouragement in Christ, if there is any consolation of love, if there is any fellowship of the Spirit, if any affection and compassion, make my joy complete by being of the same mind, maintaining the same love, united in spirit, intent on one purpose” (Phil 2:1-2, NASU). Notice the terms: encouragement, consolation, love, fellowship, affection, compassion, joy, united. These are produced by the Spirit. How could this be accomplished? The answer is given: “Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves; do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others” (vv. 3-4).

The mind or attitude of Jesus is what we are aiming for (v. 5), and this was demonstrated by His self-emptying act of dying for us. And as John would say, “We know love by this, that He laid down His life for us; and we ought to lay down our lives for the brethren” (1 John 3:16).

For the child of God, we are to speak with grace (Col 4:6), love (Eph 4:15), and kindness devoid of bitterness (Eph 4:31-32). We don’t revile or insult in return when such is hurled at us (1 Pet 2:21-23). And Jesus is our example in this.

I am aware that there were times Jesus spoke more harshly, calling out hypocrites for what they were (Matt 23). Yet Jesus knew hearts in ways we do not. He can judge what we are not capable of judging. Be very careful in trying to justify hard language, especially that which is graceless and insulting. We can be direct and straightforward and still be respectful.

We can do better, can we not? I can, and I intend to. If we have arguments to make, make them without rancor and insult. Whether we are talking with unbelievers or fellow saints, we gain nothing by harsh rhetoric that requires us to know the hearts of those with whom we have our discussions. Let the truth be spoken so it can do what the Lord intends for it to do, and let us avoid speaking in a manner that is wrong.